If you don’t take care of yourself you may find you are uncared for!
Looking after yourself is not a sin and it is not being selfish nor is it making yourself more important than the people you love and care about. Self care is simply taking what you need so you can continue to function to the benefit of everyone in your world.
This video film talks about three important self care issues that are always coming to the fore in therapy sessions.
1. It seems that a lot of people think that being tough is the same as being efficient and effective. I don’t think it is. Being efficient and effective is a flexible approach that takes into account the actuality of the world and your own context. Being tough is just being tough even if is may not be the right approach. I call being tough, irrespective of what is happening, to an Oak Tree Solution.
2. Being tough is often hard, a simpler way of doing things may be to recognise you have value and as such you deserve as much care and attention as anyone else in your world. That is just a fact. Failing to recognise or acknowledge this fact is just burying your head in the sand. You can do it but you get sand in your hair.
3. People do not value what is so freely given. If you give without concern for yourself then people will come to expect it and will not value it. They will assume you don’t value your time so they won’t either. This is the sting in the tail of giving without self care. It is often motivated by love and concern but creates resentment and distress.
Value yourself and know that you matter. Give of yourself because you want to not because you have to, that makes your giving a conscious choice not an automatic habit that is hardly acknowledged.